The Looney Bin

i realize that i carry so much frustration and stress in my body, and i don't quite know what to do with it, but days like today make me realize how much of it is caused my the insanity i put up with on a daily basis at my job- a.k.a- the looney bin.

the art director is leaving, so i was next in line to pitch in, which i don't mind; in fact, i need the money. so today my new responsibility started. the only problem is that it involves working with satan, a guy who makes my flesh crawl just by his sheer presence, not to mention his abominating personality, or lack thereof. so that whole scene was tense, to say the least. he saw me doing it, got all pissed off, and stormed into the boss' office to complain. not abnormal for him, by the way.

then, lucy-fur, the office gossip/backstabber/control freak, who had her hours (thank god) cut to 2 days a week was there today, looking like a fish out of water. she was just standing around, evesdropping, or so it seemed, probably reeling from the lack of control she now has.

the boss was a little cranky. he found out that another employee, who is starting his own publication, is using some of his employees on the new venture. that didn't go over too well. then there's the tech guy installing and uninstalling monitors in the midst of all this, leaving boxes all over the floor. and finally, the freaky energy bouncing off the walls, as if some lunar activity was possessing everyone in the office.

and then there's the usual stuff that makes a sensical intelligent person with any shred of work ethic want to start drinking heavily or breaking office furniture over people's heads.

case in point: first thing yesterday, i am welcomed to work with an email full of accusations from the headbitch (sales rep) that i haven't paid her commissions on 35 ads. nevermind, she's maybe caught 1 mistake i've made in 3 years. the rest are all hers. nevermind that she phrases the questions as accusatory statements: "i haven't been paid on". nevermind that i have $50,000 worth of billing to get out. let me drop everything and work on your neruotic paranoia. nevermind that it's a total waste of my time, and that 1/2 of them she's already asked me about and i've already answered. i especially love finding that it was her lack of note-taking that was to blame. today she welcomed me nicely with a voice mail so bitchy that i deleted it halfway through- complaining about me asking her for contracts i was missing. toxic and selfish. no wonder i have to stuff my face with a mocha frappuchino every morning just to gear up for this crazy place.

which brings us to gumby, our sales rep who couldn't sell ice in a heat wave. god bless him; he's so nice, but so in the wrong field. Instead of getting his advertisers to sign a month long contract and getting payment up front, he runs around to 10 different places each week, on deadline day, collecting (hopefully) the money for one more week. same chump who just ran an ad without contract or payment in our big supplement. who does shit like this??? his favorite words are, "he's good for it".

social butterfly, who's usually cool in my book, because she is the only sales rep who bothers to get pre-payment for almost all her ads, was even on my shit list today. she ran an ad last week, without bothering to notice that their contract was expired. so now we may be out that money. being the collections person, it feels like working my ass off to collect every little penny, while walking behind someone who is throwing money on the sidewalk.

and then there is satan, who has 2 ads without payment on the AR report already. today he hands me a piece of paper with a credit card and an amount to charge of $645, sans rundates or signature. i email him that we need a signature. his response? "she's cool". that was so fucking hysterical, i had to laugh- it was that or get a gun. i swear. oh, far be it for ME, the accounts receivable/ credit manager to tell YOU what our credit policy is.
thanks for informing ME. that's rich. on so many levels!!!
so i joked with the art director,
oh, we have a new credit policy. visa, mastercard, or are you cool? what a joke this place is.
by the time i get to leave for the day, i feel like so my hostility is stuffed into my body and brain that i have to detox!
this place could be a research facility for the mentally insane!
whooo- saaaah