I Don't Do Mediocrity

so i had a small bit of an ephinany this morning
i know i'm always angry, and i'm so frustrated by that
i don't understand what the hell i'm so angry about
except that my job drives me crazy
but i realized it's A LOT to do with this job
not just this job
but every job i've ever had
and it's because i always KNEW i would do something huge
i would "show them"- the people, namely my parents, who never believed in me, and the kids at school who treated me like a lower life form just because i sported more hair than the missing link.
probably because no one did believe in me, i determined for myself that i would make a difference, save the world, be loved by all, etc etc
i think in retrospect, that was a backlash to feeling like i never mattered
by being kicked around. i told myself, 'they don't know how special i am; how amazing i am; well, i'll show them!'
i couldn't wait to get let free to leave them in the dust
well, this life i have going was NEVER in the plan
working for a local newspaper?
i'm pissed.

i'm resentful of everyone at my job that i'm there
sounds kinda arrogant, but i was born to be so much more than this.
i was destined to do so much more with my life. that's why people like julia and linda set me on fire
they are living in that plane that i should be operating in

and then it hit me,
i hate my job because i'm always battling 1/2 ass work and mindset, incompetece, lack of work ethic and complete apathy.
everyone who works there does so because they're too damn lazy to work their ass off at a real job. because no one else would pay them for the pitiful lack of effort they put out.
and here's the thing,
I JUST DON'T DO MEDIOCRITY
that's why i got into a fight with my boss over satan. i told him he's not doing anything. well, he didn't want to hear that, but he's wasting his money by paying that guy to jack off all day. that's wrong on so many levels. A) he's taking advantage of the boss' trust in him to do his job while he's not looking B) because he's not doing his job, i have to do it, leaving him more time to play around. C) he doesn't care anymore, and it's obvious to me, but obviously not to the boss.
i can't stand to be around people who have no conscience and no work ethic. i literally could not sit there and surf the net, waste all my day chatting on IMS when i was supposed to be making sales calls. i could not do goof off if my numbers were in the toilet and my job wasn't getting done. and i hate being around people like that, especially when they are getting paid to do nothing, and since they are not doing anything, that means, i have to do what they are getting paid to do.
and i hate spending my time doing work that means nothing to me. i mean, who cares about a local paper?
i don't even believe in or like newspapers.
that job is all about mediocrity (every one i've ever had has been). and i don't do that. i can't sit there and watch my boss throw away his money on incompetent pricks who spend all day IMing and surfing the net. i can't watch them trade paying accounts on stupid trades and whims.
mediocrity doesn't work for me.